You cat lovers know who you are. I see your Facebook pictures, you can’t hide. And one weird phenomenon that we all share in common is the hole in the doughnut.

Every morning our cat Sissy Ree knocks on my office door. She looks up waiting for me to get my shit together then heads down the hallway to the kitchen. She stops at the same 3 spots and rubs her scent then proceeds to her bowl and sits looking down. She looks over her shoulder at me.

It is not that her bowl is empty, but she can see the bottom. Oh the shame she must feel for us, derelict in our duties. There is a hole in the doughnut. She will have none of this. She will not participate and stands as still as a porch jockey until the hole is filled. I fill the hole and she daintily consumes the nom.

I don’t think she is trying to assert her dominance, not really. I think for her it is a matter of completeness. She does not care for doughnuts with a haughty air she thinks “Let me eat cake”.

For anyone reading this that thinks cats are not useful, she is a constant reminder that I am inferior. She is alarm clock, sleeper in sunbeams and arbiter of doughnut holes.

Next time you drop by Dunkin, you might even look down at the frosted cake doughnut and think to yourself “What a gyp! ” – Why the hell is there a hole in my doughnut?